


fear is the mind killer

by squishitude



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Dave is an ISFJ and so am I so hence the all of him in this fic, M/M, Mentions of homophobia, Season 2 spoilers, dave is a himbo and we love and respect him, dot is lesbian sorry I don’t make the rules, excessive use of commas bc I don’t like ellipses, hashtag bring back Cody in season 3, herb is a good egg, just let them be in love Steve I’m begging you, theres lots of pauses and flailing, this is what I want in season 3 im manifesting it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:01:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25875532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squishitude/pseuds/squishitude
Summary: “....and then Herb showed up.”Klaus still hadn’t spoken, frozen in disbelief. It was Dave, in the flesh, older than he’d last seen him in 1963, older than he’d last seen him in 1968.Akame finding a way to put Dave in season 3 because I’m still ugly crying about Klave
Relationships: Klaus Hargreeves/David "Dave" Katz
Comments: 36
Kudos: 268





	fear is the mind killer

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic I’ve written in years, and I’ve never been much of a writer so pls be nice to me 🥺  
> My whole idea for this was literally just the last couple of lines and I had planned on just writing a little blurb but then it just turned into actual one shot length rip  
> And now it’s 3am goodnight  
> OH WAIT  
> I mainly make tua art so if you’re interested you can find me on tumblr @squishitude  
> Come yell in my inbox about klave  
> NOW goodnight 💋

“....and then Herb showed up.”

Klaus still hadn’t spoken, frozen in disbelief. It was Dave, in the flesh, older than he’d last seen him in 1963, older than he’d last seen him in 1968. 

Klaus and his siblings had only been back in this twisted version of 2019 for a week. Refusing to stay under the same roof as Reginald and the strange Not-Ben that Klaus is doing his best to ignore the existence of, Allison had rumored them some living arrangements, a decent-sized house made cramped by forcing six people into it.

The last seven days had been a bit of a blur for Klaus, partially due to alcohol and partially due to general apathy. After all the shit that’s happened over the past few years, what’s a brand new timeline where the Umbrella Academy was never formed, really? At least there’s no apocalyptic or assassin-based threat. Allison’s weeping and Five’s crazed muttering had just become background noise to him at this point as he spent his days nursing a bottle of gin and taking three-hour long baths.

He was alone in the house, the others had all fucked off earlier that morning to do whatever, not that he’d been listening. He’d been just about to head upstairs to draw a bath when he caught a flash of light in his peripheral vision and heard the telltale landing of feet on the cherrywood living room floor.

He’d felt an instinctual trepidation at this, reminded of his party with Hazel and Cha Cha three years ago, but his feet pulled him towards the living room anyway.

And there stood David Joseph Katz, the lost love Klaus thought he’d never see again.

Dave had stumbled over his words, greeting Klaus, the southern manners Dave’s mother had ingrained in him taking over as he tried to exchange pleasantries and ask how Klaus was doing. 

And Klaus found himself with a thousand things to say, and yet none at the same time. His mouth just hung open slightly as he stared at Dave, basking in his presence. Klaus’ stare danced from Dave’s sea foam eyes to the stubble on his strong jaw to the way his dark hair flopped over his forehead to the barest hint of smile lines near his mouth. He looked to be in his early thirties, closer to Klaus’ age now than he’d been when they were together. Except they were never together now, were they?

Dave, who only became more talkative when nervous, started babbling when he received no response, recapping what he’d been doing since they’d last met in 1963.

Turns out, Dave went into the Marines and not the Army like in the original timeline. It seems that Klaus’ meddling had worked in a way. Dave was never a Sky Soldier, hadn’t died on February 21st, 1968.

Had never met Klaus in 1968.  


He’d served for several years, regretted enlisting like Klaus had told him he would 56 years ago. Like Klaus had told him a week ago.

Dave retired from the Marines in 1969 and went back home to Dallas to build a life. He’d thrown himself into helping his community, spent all his free time volunteering, even attended several anti-war protests.

Dave ended up becoming a middle school English teacher, which didn’t surprise Klaus. Dave loved kids, and he knew he’d never be able to have any of his own, so helping shape young minds was the next best thing to him. 

Once while they’d been on a late night watch, they’d told childhood stories back and forth— though Klaus’ were curated and fudged a bit to sound more normal of course.

Dave had talked about a writing teacher he’d had in the 6th grade that he’d really looked up to, Mr. Hanks.  
Dave’s family had only just moved to Dallas at the time, and Dave hadn’t made any friends yet. He used to eat lunch in the man’s classroom, where the two talked a lot. Jacob Hanks was a gentle man in his 40s with hair grown out to his shoulders, and Dave liked the bright, patterned shirts he wore each day. Something about the man just exuded a kind of openness and trustworthiness that Dave has never encountered before. He felt safe with Mr. Hanks and vented his childish thoughts and concerns to him often.

Dave had been so concerned with fitting in at the time, he felt like an outsider in the new school as well as in his family, though he didn’t have the words at the time to articulate exactly why he felt that way.

Mr. Hanks, halfway through a tuna sandwich and only three out of thirty tests graded, just smiled knowingly and said, “You’ll find your people, son. You ain’t the only one. Even if it ain’t here, once you go out into the world, you’ll find your people. Everyone belongs somewhere.” Dave had scoffed at the time, muttered about how grown ups just don’t get it, but for some reason it had stuck with him.

One day Dave’s father picked him and his siblings up from school and he’d spotted Mr. Hanks outside. The whole ride home he’d muttered about “those damn queers” trying to “infect” children’s minds. Dave’s siblings didn’t bat an eye, too busy blabbering about homework and how Ricky Martinez punched Bobby Fischer in the face in the lunchroom that day.

Dave had stayed rigid in his seat, sick to his stomach, and he couldn’t shake the feeling for the rest of the night.

He never stayed behind in Mr. Hanks’ classroom again after that. The next school year, Mr. Hanks was gone.  


Dave had spoken of the man with such reverence, how grateful he’d been for him. He’d declared that when his tour ended and he went home, he wanted to become a teacher, to be a sanctuary for kids like himself, who felt like they didn’t belong.

“I wish I could go back and thank him, say sorry.” Dave had confided, staring out into the jungle, remorse in his eyes.

Klaus had leaned his head on Dave’s shoulder, pressing a soft kiss to his neck, and said, “I think he knows.”

.  
.  
.  
.  
.  


Klaus wet his dry lips and finally replied, “...from the Commission?” Dave, who kept shifting his feet and hadn’t met Klaus’ eyes the entire time he’d spoken, glanced up at him in surprise, smiling a little at getting a response.

“Yeah!” Dave replied with a tad too much vigor before clearing his throat and pulling back a bit. “I’m uh, still not too familiar with it all. He showed up outta nowhere and offered me a job in conflict resolution. It was kinda strange since I had never given my resume to this place as far as I can remember, but the pay sounded so good it had me curious. Then Herb opened his briefcase, and I was dizzy, and then we were somewhere else?” That had been months ago and Dave still found it hard to wrap his head around the whole time-traveling briefcase thing. If he hadn’t seen it with his own eyes and experienced it multiple times, Dave would have never believed in any of this. It had definitely freaked him out, but at the same time his nerdy little heart soared at the similarities to all the science fiction novels he loved to read. “And then we were in this big fancy building and they gave me the run-down on what the job really is.”

Klaus cut in, “Uh, yeah, I thought you hated conflict? You never struck me as the assassin type.” When they’d soldiered together, Dave had told Klaus it would be his last tour. He’d seen how pointless the war was, the cruelty the American military wrought, the senseless casualties on both sides. He’d lost too many friends to still believe they were doing any good.

Dave’s eyes practically bugged out of his skull as he sputtered, “ A-a-what? Assassin? I—,” he choked on his shock and cleared his throat, “Not at all! They just analyze different timelines and send me in to make small changes, sorta like butterfly effect stuff I guess? Talking to a cashier at the grocery store, checking out a library book, petting a dog, at most I’ve fiddled with a traffic light to slow down uh, traffic. I mean, I don’t really get the science behind it, but it seems pretty harmless?” Dave pauses, scratching his face before flailing his hands a bit, “I just—assassins?? He said they were rebuilding and rebranding, did they used to do _murder_?? Should I be worried?!” He flailed his arms a little again, his hands fisting around nothing, before running his fingers through his hair, his right hand on his hip tapping his fingers anxiously. He was starting to spiral and overthink. _Was taking this job a mistake? Was he in way over his head? He shouldn’t have come here, he’s acting nuts isn’t he? God, this is—_  


“—ey, hey,” Klaus had taken a few steps closer and his palms came to rest momentarily on Dave’s shoulders to catch his attention before flinching and pulling them back to his sides almost regretfully. “Sorry, uh I don’t think you need to worry? I didn’t mean to freak you out. _I mean, the Commission does have a history_ — well, that doesn’t matter! He was right, they are completely restarting, and I trust Herb. I mean, you’ve met the guy? I could pour hot coffee in his lap and he’d apologize to _me_.” Dave chuckled at that and seemed to calm down a bit which calmed Klaus in turn. “He visits a lot actually. He and Diego have a nerdy little handshake and everything. You’re in good hands.”

Dave sighed in relief, “Well, that’s good to know. I was afraid I’d uprooted my whole life for nothin’,” which reminded Klaus,

“Oh yeah, what about teaching? Wasn’t that like, your dream? Like your old teacher—?” He cut himself off. It was so hard to talk to him, because he’s _Dave_ , but he’s not _his_ Dave, and Klaus shouldn’t talk like he knows him but he _does_ , but he doesn’t wanna freak him out—

“Yeah it was great! I taught middle school for a few years, and I loved it, I loved the kids, it was really fulfilling...” he paused in thought and Klaus waited, his question of _then why did you leave?_ hanging in the air without needing to be said, “I don’t know how, but the school board found out I was a, uh,” he gulped, “a queer, and I got fired.” 

He still felt this instinctual fear of telling anyone his sexuality, which he supposed must just be par for the course when you’re gay in the sixties. The Commission is stationed in the fifties, sure, but everyone in that building is from a different time period, with different values, and as a whole, being gay seems to not be a big deal to them? The first time a woman had shown up to take Dot out for lunch and had given her a peck on the lips, Dave broke out in a cold sweat, frozen in place, just like he’d been in his father’s car all those years ago. But then he’d glanced around and no one had batted an eyelash. And that wasn’t a fluke, Dot and her girlfriend were always openly affectionate towards each other and everyone truly had no issue with it. Not that he’d admit it out loud, but Dave may have cried a little when he got home that evening. 

Despite knowing that it’s okay, he’s still nervous, even though Klaus would probably be the last person to judge him, what with how he looks and how the last time Dave had seen him he’d kinda insinuated that they had been— together?

God, that was a whole thing in itself.

“Oh shit, that’s terrible!” Klaus looked at him with soft green eyes and went to put his hand on Dave’s shoulder before aborting the movement, stifling the instinct to comfort him. Dave kinda wished he hadn’t stopped. “I’m so sorry, Dave.”

“I guess I wasn’t really surprised, I figured it’d happen eventually. I moved after that actually. Went to San Francisco, wanted to start over I guess. But I just couldn’t find a job, and my savings were almost out, I guess that’s really a big part of why I took this job. I just, didn’t really have anything else,” he finished flatly, not really knowing how to continue from that. It seemed Klaus didn’t really either, because he was quiet for several moments before asking,

“So, how come you’re here?”

Realizing how that might sound, he backtracked, “Not that it’s a bad thing! Just, were you looking for someone or—?”, he trailed off, looking behind himself as if someone else would appear.

“I was looking for you.”

Klaus’ eyes widened almost imperceptibly as he looked back at Dave, his expression composed but almost hopeful. Did Dave somehow remember him? Remember _them_? “You were?”

“I wanted to thank you,” Dave started, “I mean, you kinda saved my life.” Klaus’ face dropped with disappointment before he shrugged it off, waving a tattooed hand, physically shooing away the gratitude.

“Oh, no, you don’t need to, I didn’t really do anything.” he denied.

“We were, well, together, right? In the army, the same unit. You... saw me die, knew exactly when it happened.” 

Klaus’ throat dried; he crossed his arms, holding himself as he looked away and squeaked out a “Yeah.”

“And you somehow ended up back in 1963 after that, I’m assuming because of the Commission?” Klaus looked back at him, furrowed his brow in thought before lifting his hand in a so-so gesture, his head mimicking the back and forth movement. “And you tried to stop me from enlisting. So I wouldn’t die.” 

Klaus shrugged, chuckling without humor, “Didn’t do too good a job at that, did I?”, he countered, a self-deprecating lilt to his tone.

“You still did _something_. We were in the army the first time around, right? But after talking to you my uncle took me to enlist in the Marines. So I didn’t die on that hill. And we... didn’t meet.” It was still hard to wrap his head around. That Dave had, presumably, fallen in love with this guy he’d never met in a place he’d never been. Their last conversation at the commune had stuck in Dave’s head, how Klaus knew so much about him, had dog tags with Dave’s full name, blood type, and religion on it. When Dave had held them in his hands they felt worn on the edges and on some of the lettering, as if it’d been held a lot, fingers rubbing at it lovingly. It had freaked him out at the time. And the fear and confusion just made him double down on what he _did_ know. What he thought he knew, at least. “It’s not much different from what I do. Like a butterfly effect. One small change saved my life. Thank you for that. Thank you for caring about me.”

Klaus still just wanted to brush it off. “It’s really nothing,” he reaffirmed, but then he looked at Dave, a warm little smile softening his features, “but you’re welcome.” Dave smiled back at him.

They stood there, staring into each others’ eyes and basking in the warmth of the moment, before Klaus broke it, looking away as if he couldn’t allow himself to enjoy it too much. “So uh, is that all you needed?” Klaus asked, pretending to find the crown molding near the ceiling particularly interesting. “I’m sure you’re busy with your uh,” he waved a hand flippantly, shifting his weight nervously, “—traffic-causing. Making a gardener late to work so we don’t get nuked or something.”

“Oh, I’m off right now actually.” Dave replied. “Herb let me use a briefcase off duty since I was just coming here.” Klaus looked at him again.

“Oh.” he replied, not really knowing what else to say. The air between them was stale for a few moments before Dave finally worked up the nerve to ask,

“Wanna go get lunch?”

Klaus definitely hadn’t expected that, “Uh.” he replied intelligently, his brain cells struggling to rub together to form a response.

And now Dave’s conversationally flailing again. “Or uh, we could get coffee if you’d like that better? I hear that’s a big thing now? Don’t they have like, espresso and stuff? In those little tiny cups like they have in Italy? My Aunt went to Italy once—“ Klaus’ giggling finally stopped him. The back of his right hand was pressed against his snickering face, his palm visible, reading _hello_ , and Klaus looked at Dave with what could only be described as love in his eyes.

Dave composed himself again, “I uh, figured you already know me, so I wanna get to know you, too. If that’s okay?”

Klaus moves his hand from his face, shamelessly smiling at Dave now. “You know what? Sure. There’s a shitty little diner around the corner. Their coffee tastes like mud, you’ll love it.” Dave did like his coffee strong, to the point that he’d gotten pranked a couple times by one of his men handing him an actual cup of mud water. One morning he’d been so exhausted and bleary-eyed he actually took a sip before realizing what it was, which started up even _more_ jokes. Funny how something like that came back around. They shared a good-natured laugh before Klaus started to lead him out.  


“You were right, by the way.” Dave started. Klaus turned back towards him, holding the front door open.

“Huh? About what?”

“I did love Dune.”

**Author's Note:**

> There wasn’t a good place to fit this in, but Herb offered Dave the job because of his combined military experience and social skills (aka being an unofficial counselor)  
> I think the new Commission would try to take the nonviolent route, but they’d want people trained just in case they can’t in some case. And again, the social skills so he can deescalate a situation if ever needed.  
> And also because as Dave said, he’d lost his job and moved, wasn't really tied to anything. His family might have found out why he was fired and cut him off, or he just kinda drifted apart from them.  
> So that’s why he was picked.  
> As for finding Klaus, I imagine Herb sees Diego regularly, and he probably talks about the Hargreeves, and Dave probably heard Klaus’ name and was like hey wait—  
> Herb has a soft spot for all the Hargreeves so he was like ofc here take my briefcase and get ya mans
> 
> Also yes the title is a quote from Dune bc I didn’t know what else to use


End file.
